Top Ten Ways You Can Tell Someone Near You Is Only Using 1 Square Of Toilet Paper Per Visit

I'm sure you have heard Sheryl Crow's suggestion that we all do our part in helping to be more environmentally conscious by using only one square of toilet paper per visit. I thought I would help you identify those close to you might be actually taking Ms. Crow's suggestion seriously. I'm sure most would not discuss such delicate matters in public so you might need to know the signs of those who are "green" when it comes to toilet paper. So here are the Top Ten Ways To Identify Someone Close To You Who Is Using Only 1 Square Of Toilet Paper Per Visit.

10. They are constantly running comparison tests at home trying to decide which toilet paper is the thickest and most absorbent.
9. They ask restaurant managers how many plies the toilet paper in the restrooms have.
8. They run comparisons tests at home to see which toilet paper is the thickest and most absorbent.
7. They have a new gig - doing commercials for the toilet paper company that claims to have the thickest and most absorbent paper.
6. They're getting fatter - saved money from toilet paper goes for more food.
5. No one shakes hands with them.
4. People are seen running away from them holding their noses.
3. Their hands have turned a funky color.
2. They've dumped their stock in toilet paper and purchased Clean Butt's Bidetspa stock.
1. They've put photovaltaic cells on their roof to power their new Clean Butt's Bidetspa and save electricity.